But this autumn I plan to do something different: autumn cleaning.
You know how, in spring, there's that sense of new freshness when we embark on speed-cleaning to literally and figuratively get the cobwebs out? Well, although we don't have the Thanksgiving holiday in the UK that our friends in the US do, I think that autumn is still the perfect time to take stock and really evaluate our lives.
Questions to ask yourself to help 'take stock' of your life so far this year.
Here are a few questions to ask yourself if you'd like to embark on an autumn clean. (Warm beverages are an optional but beneficial accessory to the planning stage...)
- What have I done this year that I'm proud of?
- Who would I like to contact that I haven't spoken to recently, to say 'hi' or generally catch up?
- What am I going to read this winter that will nourish my mind as well as feed my soul?
- What can I plan now to do in 2015, so that I can look forward to it?
- What's the biggest task I've been putting off for a while? How can I take 3 small steps towards getting this done. What deadline will I set myself?
- What two things can I do right now to feel better about myself, my life or my career?
- What clutter can I clear out of my closets? (Just when you thought this piece wasn't really about cleaning! Sorry. You were wrong.)
- Who can I forgive?
START DOING SOMETHING NOW!
I forget where I read it, but one management book made it so clear how to reach your goals (please let me know if you recall the source). It involved three simple steps.
3 simple steps to de-clutter
- Know what you want.
- Know what you need to do to get what you want.
- Do it.
How to apply step 1 (know what you want)
Often we don't know what we want in the first place, which makes it tricky to follow the first step. So you can use this 'autumn cleaning list' to give yourself a head start.Then move on to step 2. It's not as hard as you think.
How to apply step 2 (know what you need to do to get what you want)
If you're doing something like making a list of things you're proud of, reaching out to friends, choosing books, setting a plan to feel better about yourself or choosing to forgive someone the steps would generally be:
- Make the list.
- Take a quick action to get something on the list crossed off.
- Feel proud of yourself for having taken an action.
- Try something else if you found that easy.
6. Address the 'feel better' about life question
Give yourself a day. Plan to do exactly what you want and what makes you happy for a full 24 hours. No interruptions allowed! No work, family obligations or interferences that don't contribute to a "me" day should be permitted. Or, if it's physically impossible to take a whole day, then just take an hour, or 20 minutes. But whatever you do: give yourself that uninterrupted time to think, plan, dream, forgive and recover (or, with only 20 minutes, use this time to plan an activity or place and time you can use to rest and recover).
And rather than using this time to feel sorry for yourself, use this time to list the things you're grateful for and the ways you've made life better, easier, or just happier for other people. Then think about what you'd like to do more of, and what you'd like to do less of next year. Then follow step 3 below.
7. De-clutter
Give yourself a few hours. Make 3 piles: give away, throw away, keep. But before you start, make sure you plan to include the action of actually throwing stuff away it taking it to the charity shop within the allotted 2 hours, or you'll just end up with another bag to store. (This helpful advice comes from Greg McKeown, author of Essentialism).
Also: don't worry if you don't manage to complete the task. The Chimp Paradox reminds us that we need to celebrate small wins as well as mammoth achievements: and the same goes for something as simple as making a bit more space in your life: physically or emotionally.
8. Forgive
You might even decide to do this while you're de-cluttering. And, admittedly, you might find this advice a bit odd. But it's worked for me in the past. Put a small (and non-toxic) memento of the most dangerous or damaging relationship in your life now, or from your past and BURN IT (now's a great time to sneak it onto a bonfire). Or write a letter of closure to that person and fold it into an origami boat (this wiki-how doc shows you how to do it), drop it in a river and watch as the tension and resentment you have for that place, time or person floats out of your life - and DROWNS!
Yup, there's anger as part of the forgiveness process. It's wise to get it out. But then let it go. Take away the power you have given people or events to hurt you. Realise that what happened is in the past, and that the future is in your control. And then say the words "I forgive you."
So now that we've gone through the list of all 8 ways to de-clutter your life there's only one thing left to do. Apply step three.
How to apply step 3 (do it)
Really. There's not much I can add here. Nike said it best. Just do it.
In conclusion: shake away the dead leaves of life's frustrations
These autumn-cleaning questions might not be possible to do in the time allocated, or may just seem a bit impractical, but only by giving yourself the time and space to consider that there are other ways of living than constantly rushing from place to place will you shake away the dead leaves of frustration and exhaustion, so you can start winter with a fresh mindset and be ready for the pre-Christmas rush. Because, before you know it, 2014 will be over.
But, with reflection and planning, you can make 2015 even better than 2014 has been so far, and still has the potential to be.